


Sound Like You Mean It

by shopfront



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Awkwardness, Babbling, F/F, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Post-Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-04-18
Packaged: 2019-04-20 09:41:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14258211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shopfront/pseuds/shopfront
Summary: Tilly wishes she could feel half as confident a leader as she pretended to be as Captain Killy. So Michael adds practising giving commands to Tilly's preparation for joining the command track. It's only logical, right?





	Sound Like You Mean It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [weakinteraction](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weakinteraction/gifts).



“Give me an order, Tilly,” Michael said firmly and not for the first time. “You did it plenty of times while we were in the other universe and on Qo'noS. Just start by asking yourself what Captain Killy would say, and then say something significantly less violent.”

“She’d probably order you to lick her boots or something,” Tilly muttered. Her mouth twisted and she went wide-eyed when Michael just gave her an amused stare. “No! No, I refuse to order you to lick things!”

Michael chuckled. “We already agreed that I will not actually do any of the things you tell me to. Therefore, it does not matter what you say. You just need to practice sounding confident.”

Tilly dropped her head back and groaned her displeasure to the ceiling. Then she straightened her shoulders and gestured vaguely towards the end of her bed, where her boots sat slightly misaligned with the wall. “Okay, fine. Go straighten my shoes?”

Michael tilted her head and gave Tilly a flat look. “That sounded more like a question than an order. Why don’t you try telling me to do something that you really want me to do.”

“See, that doesn’t make any sense to me. Captains have to give orders about missions they don’t necessarily believe in all the time, it’s part of how the command structure works. Starfleet gives instructions and sometimes you just have to carry them out. I mean, it might not happen all the time or that would probably mean you’re not suited for command. But it does-“

“Give me an order, Tilly," Michael said.

Tilly hunched her shoulders as her eyes darted around the room. “Yes, yes, okay. I order you to, um…. You know, this would be so much easier if I could just curse and insult you. I think that’s why I could manage it when I was pretending to be other me, or arms dealer me for that matter. I mean, aside from that thing you told me about her confidence just being a facade. It really was a facade, so pretending to put on a facade was much simpler than I thought it would be. But it was still so different to be saying those offensive things all the time and not apologising for-”

“Tilly,” Michael said.

“Okay! Okay! Sorry. Gosh darn it, okay, fine. Um, you should, um. I order you-“

“Tilly,” Michael repeated more firmly. 

“I- I order you to kiss me,” Tilly said in a rapid-fire burst.

Michael blinked and her mouth dropped open slightly as they stared at each other in shock. But before she could formulate a response, Tilly muttered something about being ‘in for a penny’ and flung herself across the room to press their lips firmly together.

“Oh my god,” Tilly said as she pulled back equally quickly. Her hand flew to her mouth, and her eyes were wide above it. “Oh no, I am so sorry. I know we already said- but just to be clear, of course you don’t actually have to kiss me. Oh, this is a disaster. I really was going to say something about it sooner. It’s just that we’ve been spending so much time working on my command skills. But so much has happened lately and I didn’t want to assume. So I’ve been nervous, and I don’t get nervous like this. You already know that kissing is probably the one area of my life where I don’t have any confidence problems. I am a _good_ kisser. But it’s just, oh, I don’t know. We’re friends, and we’re roommates, and you’re so-“

As she’d talked, Tilly's hand had dropped back down by her side unnoticed until Michael reached out to take hold of it.

“Tilly, breathe,” Michael said with a laugh in her voice. “I understand.”

Tilly visibly deflated with relief. “Oh, thank goodness. That really was very presumptuous of me,” she said with a slightly hysterical giggle. Then she finally seemed to notice that Michael was holding her hand because her fingers spasmed slightly in Michael’s grip. “Oh, okay, we're holding hands now. Um, is this a reassuring friend thing? Because if you want to let me down easy, it’s totally okay. You do not need to put us both through that. Or, wait, is this a Vulcan thing? They have a whole finger based affection ritual on Vulcan, don’t they? Are you kissing me right-“

“I’m just as human as you are,” Michael reminded her. She leant forward slightly as she spoke as if to make a confession. “You won’t need to wonder what I’m doing when I kiss you.”

Tilly nodded silently for a long moment and then furrowed her brow. “When, not if? So you’re not letting me down gently? Just to be… clear, and all,” she eventually said haltingly.

Michael hesitated. “As you said, we are already friends and roommates,” she said slowly and then paused again to consider her words. But when she opened her mouth to continue, Tilly quickly cut her off.

“So it would be logical, right? Or a disaster. A totally epic disaster. Just like this conversation. I know we don’t necessarily say this outright all that often, but you should know that you’re really important to me. I don’t want to lose that. Whatever you decide about the whole kissing thing,” she said as she raised their joined hands and waved them at Michael, then frowned. “Or actual kissing, or whatever.”

Finally Tilly took a deep breath and visibly halted the string of words. Michael pressed her lips together to smother another chuckle. As Michael observed her, Tilly fidgeted. However, she quickly noticed the closeness of Michael’s attention and winced as she raised her chin. Ready to face the consequences of her actions regardless of how worried her eyes looked.

“Is this what you had in mind when you asked me to help you practice your ‘command voice’? To approach me romantically?” Michael asked with a quirk of an eyebrow.

Tilly’s eyes widened. “No, no no no,” she started to protest, until Michael cut her off by giving into the laugh that had been lurking. “Oh, you were joking. I see,” she said in a huff. “That’s fine. I think I might be having a very small heart attack but at least you’re amused, I guess.”

With a shake of her head, Michael let the laughter fall from her voice. “I want more than logic in my life these days. Especially my love life, even after... everything,” she said seriously.

“I still don’t know what that means,” Tilly said a little forlornly.

Michael raised her free hand to brush a curl back from Tilly’s face. “It means this,” she said as she leant forward. This time the kiss wasn’t an abrupt collide and retreat of flesh against flesh. It was softer and more exploratory. Tilly’s surprised exhale was a puff of air against Michael’s lower lip, and then she gently took Michael’s face in her hands and deepened the kiss.

“That was one heck of a kiss,” Tilly said breathlessly when they parted. Michael slowly opened her eyes to the sight of Tilly with eyes still shut and a dreamy smile on her lips. “If I’d known you’d want to kiss me like that, I might have told you to do it sooner.”

“Ordered me,” Michael correctly gently and then took a quick step back. Tilly's eyes fluttered open as she grasped at the air in front of her in confusion. “Now, give me another order Captain Tilly.”

Tilly gaped at Michael for a moment, and then closed her mouth with a snap. “I don’t want to practice giving orders anymore. I just. That is, I want to ask you to accompany me to that movie they’re showing tonight on the observation deck,” she said, nervous tension written across her face as she stood stock-still and waited for an answer.

Michael pursed her lips thoughtfully and raised her eyebrows. "A logical next step in our relationship.”

“It’s not like we have anyone else to go with,” Tilly agreed as she relaxed and then startled slightly. "Not that that's the only reason I'm asking! Oh god."

Michael ducked her head and grinned until she dimpled. “I would enjoy seeing the movie with you, Tilly. Even if we did have other people to go with.”

When she looked up again, Tilly was just looking at her softly. “Are you sure I don’t need to sound like I want it more?”

Michael took a step towards the door and tilted her head at it in an invitation for Tilly to follow her. “You sounded sure enough of yourself to me."


End file.
